They were standing with their backs to it, getting warm, when Horn crossed the yard. Harry noticed at once that Horn was limping. Harry, Ron, and Hermione moved closer together to block the fire from view; they were sure it wouldn't be allowed. Unfortunately, something about their guilty faces caught Horn's eye. He limped over. He hadn't seen the fire, but he seemed to be looking for a reason to tell them off anyway.
"What's that you've got there, Potter?"
It was Harry Potter and Half Blood Prince. Harry showed him.
"That movie is not to be shown until next year," said Horn. "Give it to me. Five points from Gryffindor."
"He's just made that rule up," Harry muttered angrily as Horn limped away. "Wonder what's wrong with his leg?"
"Dunno, but I hope it's really hurting him," said Ron bitterly.
"I knew it," Hermione gasped, "Horn—look."
Ron grabbed the binoculars. Horn was in the middle of the stands opposite them. He had his eyes fixed on Half Blood Prince movie date and was muttering nonstop under his breath.
"He's doing something—jinxing the date," said Hermione.
"What should we do?"
"Leave it to me."
"Let me introduce my assistant, Professor Snape," said Horn, flashing a wide smile. "He tells me he knows a tiny little bit about dueling himself and has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration before we begin. Now, I don't want any of you youngsters to worry—you'll still have your Potions master when I'm through with him, never fear!"
"Wouldn't it be good if they finished each other off?" Ron muttered in Harry's ear.
Snape's upper lip was curling. Harry wondered why Horn was still smiling; if Snape had been looking at him like that he'd have been running as fast as he could in the opposite direction.
Horn and Snape turned to face each other and bowed; at least, Horn did, with much twirling of his hands, whereas Snape jerked his head irritably. Then they raised their wands like swords in front of them.
"As you see, we are holding our wands in the accepted combative position," Horn told the silent crowd. "On the count of three, we will cast our first spells. Neither of us will be aiming to kill, of course."
"I wouldn't bet on that," Harry murmured, watching Snape baring his teeth.
"One-two-three-"
Both of them swung their wands above their heads and pointed them at their opponent; Snape cried: "Expelliarmus!" There was a dazzling flash of scarlet light and Horn was blasted off his feet: He flew backward off the stage, smashed into the wall, and slid down it to sprawl on the floor.
----------------------------------
As you can see, I want to soo much see that last one happen to Horn. That would give me a good laugh. _________________ Slytherin.
"And Harry said last night," retorted Ron, "if it means we're supposed to get matey with Alan Horn, fat chance."
"Well, I think it's a pity we're not trying for a bit of reconciliation," said Hermione crossly.
They had reached the foot of the marble staircase. A line of fourth-year Ravenclaws was crossing the entrance hall; they caught sight of Horn and hurried to form a tighter group, as though frightened he might push the date back further..
"Yeah, we really ought to be trying to make friends with people like that," said Harry sarcastically.
"Yes," said Luna simply, "Alan Horn. He was a quite an extraordinary man, you know, but he did like to push dates forward and one of his push-forewards went rather badly wrong one day."
"'Alan Association,'" repeated Ron with a sneer worthy of Malfoy. "It's pathetic. Well, I hope you enjoy your party. Why don't you try hooking up with McLaggen, then Alan can make you King and Queen Horn-- _________________ Yas and Simmy - putting Luna on catwalks since 2008!
"I'm disgusted," said Professor McGonagall. "The Half-Blood-Prince movie delayed by 8 months in one night! I've never heard of such a thing before! You, Mr. Horn, I thought you had more sense. I thought the Harry Potter fans meant more to you than this. Your company will be boycotted – yes, your company, Mr. Horn, nothing gives you the right to delay Harry Potter movies, especially these days, it's very dangerous."
_________________ "The best of us must sometimes eat our words." -- Albus Dumbledore
OoO . . . what happened to the one quote a day, kwidditch? You're slacking!
Here are a few that I just made up. I've included the original quotes underneath of them, just in case you forget one or two in the original context.:
Quote:
After all, to the well-organized mind, money is but a small reward compared to the happiness of the fans.
Quote:
After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Man with Two Faces," Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, 1997, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
^OK, so that one doesn't flow so well, but I thought it would be a good quote to change into something for this. I would love to see someone who is actually good at this do something with it . . . *hint hint*
Quote:
As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all - the trouble is, COOs do have a knack of choosing precisely those things that are worst for them.
Quote:
As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all - the trouble is, humans do have a knack of choosing precisely those things that are worst for them. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Man with Two Faces," Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, 1997, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
^Ok, so I literally just changed the word humans to the word COOs (Chief Operating Officer -- which is apparently what Horn "does" at Warner Bros.) in that one. It was pretty much perfect already!
Quote:
Never trust a COO that can't think for himself if you can't see where he keeps his wallet.
Quote:
Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain. ~J.K. Rowling, "Dobby's Reward," Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, 1999, spoken by the character Arthur Weasley
^ That one isn't really very good, either. Sorry about that.
Quote:
It's a strange thing, but when Alan Horn is dreading a Harry Potter failing, and would give anything to slow down time, he has a disobliging habit of pushing back the film.
Quote:
It's a strange thing, but when you are dreading something, and would give anything to slow down time, it has a disobliging habit of speeding up. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Hungarian Horntail," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000
^ HAHA . . . I really love that one! *gives herself a cookie*
Quote:
"Nothing like a movie push back to give you money." ~~ Alan Horn
Quote:
Nothing like a nighttime stroll to give you ideas. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Egg and The Eye," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, spoken by the character Mad-Eye Moody
Quote:
If you want to know what a COO's like, take a good look at how he treats his fans, not his bankers.
Quote:
If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals. ~J.K. Rowling, "Padfoot Returns," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, spoken by the character Sirius Black
Quote:
Being wealthy is not a sin . . . But we should exercise caution with our wealth... yes, indeed.
Quote:
Curiosity is not a sin.... But we should exercise caution with our curiosity... yes, indeed. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Pensieve," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
Quote:
Pushing back the movie until the summer won't give you more money when you finally release it.
Quote:
Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Parting of the Ways," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
OK, so that was another failure on my part. Pretend you liked it anyway.
Quote:
You place too much importance... on the so-called happiness of wealth! You fail to recognize that Harry Potter fans are going to rip you eyeballs of their sockets!!
Quote:
You place too much importance... on the so-called purity of blood! You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be! ~J.K. Rowling, "The Parting of the Ways," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
^Sorry that I completely went off of the parallel on that one . . . I got a little carried away . . .
Quote:
It is my belief... that dignity is generally preferable to money."
Quote:
It is my belief... that the truth is generally preferable to lies. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Beginning," Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
Quote:
According to COOs of hte past, the wrath of fans could leave deeper scarring than almost anything else...
Quote:
According to Madam Pomfrey, thoughts could leave deeper scarring than almost anything else... ~J.K. Rowling, "The Second War Begins," Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, 2003
Quote:
Money is making a fool of you again.
Quote:
Time is making fools of us again. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Secret Riddle," Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, 2005, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
Quote:
We must try not to sink beaneath out greed, Alan, but please the fans.
Quote:
We must try not to sink beneath our anguish, Harry, but battle on. ~J.K. Rowling, "A Sluggish Memory," Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, 2005, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
Quote:
It was, he though, the difference between disappointing the fans to make a buck and releasing the film on time with dignity in tact. Some people, perhaps would say that there was little to choose between the two ways, but Warner Brothers knew - and so do I, thought Alan, with a rush of fierce greed, and so do my bankers - that this could mean a brand new mansion or BMW.
Quote:
It was, he thought, the difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to the death and walking into the arena with your head held high. Some people, perhaps, would say that there was little to choose between the two ways, but Dumbledore knew - and so do I, thought Harry, with a rush of fierce pride, and so did my parents - that there was all the difference in the world. ~J.K. Rowling, "Horcruxes," Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, 2005
^that one was a lot of fun.
Quote:
Horn found the money as welcome as the ten bucks had been the night that he sold his grandmother; it seemed to burn away a little of the dignity fluttering in his chest.
Quote:
Harry found the hot drink as welcome as the firewhisky had been on the night that Mad-Eye had died; it seemed to burn away a little of the fear fluttering in his chest. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Thief," Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, 2007
Are these getting a little redundant if they are? I'm sorry if they are. I'm done now, anyway. _________________
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Last edited by zengrenouille on September 19, 2008 10:20 pm; edited 1 time in total
Haha all of these are just great =) _________________ "Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to release HBP on Nov 21st 2008."
Thank you! I worked hard on those . . . it's hard trying to procrastinate doing homework for a class that sucks . . . _________________
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After all, to the well-organized mind, money is but a small reward compared to the happiness of the fans.
Quote:
After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure. ~J.K. Rowling, "The Man with Two Faces," Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, 1997, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore
^OK, so that one doesn't flow so well, but I thought it would be a good quote to change into something for this. I would love to see someone who is actually good at this do something with it . . . *hint hint*
I'll take a hint.
Quote:
After all, to the well-organized mind, losing a bit of money to please millions of fans is but the next great adventure.
And one of my own:
Quote:
"This is not a joke, Potter!" growled Horn. "Was it because Dumbledore believed that only the early release of Half-Blood-Prince could defeat the Heir of Slytherin? Did he wish us to release the movie in November, Potter, because he believed, as do many, that this movie is destined to destroy He Who Must Not Be Named?"
"Interesting theory," said Harry. "Has anyone ever tried showing Voldemort a flick? Maybe Warner Bros. should put some people onto that, instead of wasting our time by delaying the movie until July. So this is what you've been doing, shut up in your office, trying to make some extra cash by delaying the movie? Fans are in depression, but there's been no word about any of that from Warner Bros., has there? And you still expect us to cooperate with you!"
_________________ "The best of us must sometimes eat our words." -- Albus Dumbledore
I love it, kwidditch! It's brilliant! It was so much better than mine! Do you see what happens when you disappear for too long? I try to get creative! Let this be a lesson to you! Keep us up-dated with these things. We need them like drugs. _________________
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Dear Mr. Horn, we are pleased to inform you that you have been denied from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Soon, you and your crewmates will be denied from every Harry Potter forums, and your education in the "Why it is a bad idea to postpone Harry Potter movies" will begin.
Hagrid: Blimey, I'd love Alan Horn.
Harry: You'd like Alan Horn?
Hagrid: Vastly misunderstood beast, Harry. Vastly misunderstood.
[Harry enters the hidden chamber where the Half Blood Prince movie reel is being kept, expecting to see Snape - but instead he sees Horn]
Harry: You!
Alan Horn: I wondered whether I'd be meeting you here, Potter.
Harry: But I thought... Snape...
Alan Horn: Yes, he does seem the type, doesn't he? Why, next to him, who would suspect poor, naive looking Alan Horn?
Dumbledore: Harry, do you know why it is that Alan Horn could not bear to have you touch him?
[Harry shakes his head]
Dumbledore: It was because of your fans. They sacrificed themselves for you, and that kind of act leaves a mark.
[Harry reaches up to touch his scar]
Dumbledore: No no, this kind of mark cannot be seen. It lives in your very skin.
Harry: And what is that?
Dumbledore: Love, Harry. Love. _________________ Slytherin.
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"Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to release HBP on Nov 21st 2008."
